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How would you kill off Roland?

DTUKDTUK
edited July 2004 in Dark Tower
Just for fun, no offense:



a)Roland finds out he's allergic to roses;



b)A night of furious self abuse causes Rolands dry wrist to become stone wrist;



c)Roland go down in some huge blaze of glory--taking the Crimson King and Mordred with him in some huge 3-way fight;



d)I would introduce Roland to my wife, and encourage them to get married. She would quickly destroy all his dreams, especially his quest. Then she would slowly kill him over a course of 40 years.  



If nothing fits in with your opinion, let's give your theory.

Comments

  • DTUKDTUK
    I'm not sure how to reply to this, as I hope he doesn't get killed off and it's hard for me to picture a way for him to die, but I would go with the "Blaze of Glory" scenario if I had to choose.



    PS - your other options were amusing :)
  • sunny99sunny99
    The last of the beam broke as he reached the shadow of the tower and alas the tower fell and quashed poor Roland to an unrecognizable pulp :P



    Urrgh. That's why I can never be as good a writer as SK, but I did not ask the question, merely answering it ;D
  • SpeedySpeedy
    Roland reaches the top of the Tower, tricks Morded into destroying the Crimson King, kills the weakened Mordred, receives a visit from Gan, asks Gan to restore all of his fallen allies, Gan refuses, Roland blows a few holes in Gan, and Roland becomes the supreme ruler of the multiverse.
  • sunny99sunny99
    In so implying, are you inferring that SK is now a conduit for Roland's thoughts or did he go down with Gan as Roland went suddenly trigger happy to become God? ;D
  • DTUKDTUK
    I always thought Roland was God, round which everything else revolved... ;D hehe
  • sunny99sunny99
    Aah. That would explain why the top of the tower is empty. Roland, apparently bored of being God got himself an unauthorised vacation as well as a convenient case of 'amnesia' to go around shooting people and gathering ka-tet members from other world, not to mention messing around with the lives of several million book readers ;D



    Boy, SK should have sold the rights of the DT series to us and let us finish the story for him. We might induce some good ol heart attack out of the poor guy ;D
  • SpeedySpeedy
    When Gan dies, the King retires!
  • sunny99sunny99
    Anybody here has any impression of what Gan would look like??



    And don't utter the words giant turtle. I am sick of giant turtles for a while. Just came off a reread of IT a few weeks prior to reading SoS and am suffering from turtle indigestion ;D
  • Ford_PrefectFord_Prefect
    he look like-a man!



    Ha ha ha

    Gan is a mighty ninja name. he has the kung-foo in the face of his enemies. he likes euchre on full moons. Long walks on the beach and hot bubble baths. His pet peeves are rude people and dogs that bite





    It would on ly be fitting for Rolands death to be in the hands of Jake but...

    perhaps he will get sympathy pains for Susannah(seeing as how he is the father) and because men cannot possibly handle the excrutiating agony that is childbirth, he just dies. ;D
  • sunny99sunny99
    It would on ly be fitting for Rolands death to be in the hands of Jake but...

    perhaps he will get sympathy pains for Susannah(seeing as how he is the father) and because men cannot possibly handle the excrutiating agony that  is childbirth, he just dies.


    What? Roland get sympathy pains? I simply will not believe that! I simply will not!  





     ;D
  • Ford_PrefectFord_Prefect
    If sussanah could get them through mia, or beacause of..or..you know what i mean, then why cant roland?????he'd "bite the bullet" but would still wussy out cuz its THE WORST PAIN ON EARTH.. Even weird parallel earths
  • sunny99sunny99
    Yeah. Parallel earths. What would we do without them.
  • Lou_SytsmaLou_Sytsma
    Based on the tarot reading by the Dark Man back in the Gunslinger - Roland and the Dark Tower are linked somehow. I can only conjecture that Roland takes on the role of a new Tower by somehow joining with the current one.
  • Ford_PrefectFord_Prefect
    awh crap, someone went and got all deep again. This one is silly.

    Parallel worlds do kick butt. you could really wrack up those freq. flier miles
  • sunny99sunny99
    Hope you are in a better mood when you get back from work tonight Pretty Penguin :D
  • Ford_PrefectFord_Prefect
    Im always in a good mood. Im just not fond of guys. I found that in my rinky-dink small town they are ignorant and much too concerned with quantity not quality
  • Ford_PrefectFord_Prefect
    Sorry that reply wouldnt make any sense unless you read the rest of mine on the other threads
  • sunny99sunny99
    Hope you find someone that could change your mind. Lots of good guys out there too :)
  • Ford_PrefectFord_Prefect
    hmm, i think im happier testosterone-free. Now im not saying that im swinging the other way.....hmm..well maybe theres a thought.... :o

    Nope, I wouldnt be able to stand that either.."what're ya thinking?" "If you dont know, im not telling you" :-*
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